Update: Celebrations of Life & Making God the Centre

Apparently I haven't posted in this blog for 3 months! (crazy, I know), so the best way to get back into it is to describe where I'm at right now.

I'm not going to lie and pretend that everything is great and easy and everyday feels like I'm running through a meadow filled with daisies, because it's not like that at all. I'm struggling.

It's not easy for me to admit that. But there are things more important than my pride. 

If you ever read my other blog, you'll understand how stressed I get over the little things, my degree is high pressure and on top of that I have other commitments, which sometimes gets on top of me, and that I get so stressed and worried over everything will leave no room for surprise with my next statement. I'm struggling to give everything to God. I think as a person, I crave control. I like to know what's happening and when. What I'm going to be doing next week, month, year. If there's something I'm not happy with I can change it. Which is the subject of my aversion to food and obsession with my weight which I went through when I was 16, I felt so out of control with my life, family relationships, this was a way in which I could regain control. It's the same as when I spend hour after hour rearranging furniture, it's to control my surroundings, my lifestyle. Of course, life rarely works out the way you plan. It's so easy to forget there's things bigger than yourself, when you're so wrapped up in your own world. When you're doing this, you aren't making God the centre, but instead making yourself God. 

You'll remember I blogged a while ago about a woman who I served at my till, who told me that God had amazing things planned for me. Well I'm finding it difficult to allow God to do this. I'm finding it hard to let him in completely, although I know that if I do, my life will be more amazing than I could have ever imagined. So I'm praying that I begin to learn this. 

I went to a funeral yesterday. It was for a 92 year old lady, who was a prominent figure in my childhood. I have the most amazing memories of her, and every time that I saw her, she'd always be so excited to see me, I'd get a hug and she'd ask me about how I was and show genuine interest in what was going on with me. She was an amazing lady, and she loved God with all her heart. She served the same church for 75 years and had an impact in everyone connected to it's lives at some point in time, including ours. 

In her eulogy, they said the line 'Her life was filled with her love for God, and her passion to serve him' and it's so true, I couldn't think of another person I know who that'd be more apt for, and it was amazing to celebrate her, and to think that she's now in heaven, walking (and dancing) with her saviour everyday. 

I think we all should aim to be a little bit more like her. She had an amazing life, and who wouldn't want that said about them at their funeral? This is the kind of life that I can say, without a shadow of a doubt, was led with God at the centre. 

So to close: R.I.P Auntie Kath, and enjoy eternity with your saviour, I can't wait to meet with you again.

XOX

Contagious love

I'm going to take this opportunity to share just an image that came into my head today, potentially from god but I'll let you make you're own minds up on that one.

I had the image in my head of a virus. Now this image is one of a standard viral diagram found in any microbiology textbook, with a protein capsule, a tail and tail fibres and genetic material stored in the head. Now this virus is working its way through a human body and the first thing I notice is how this virus is all consuming. Take an illness for example, let's say influenza. The immune response to it affects the entire body, you may get a sore throat, blocked sinuses, rhinitis. On top of that it can affect homeostasis and make the infected burn up with fever, it can cause emesis and whilst you have it in your system, you can't help it but it has an affect on you.

Now the next point I notice is that you have a reaction to it, internally this reaction is involuntary, with your immune system making hundreds and thousands of antibodies, externally we change our behaviour by going out and buying painkillers, tissues, vitamins, cold and flu relief tablets etc.

Finally, the last point I notice is that if the virus in question is going to make any kind of impact on a larger scale, then it needs to spread, this is reliant on vectors, whether that be through particles found in mucus, residues left on surfaces, say a stair banister, a door handle, or maybe it spreads through droplets in the air, leftover from a sneeze, or through physical contact from another person, it's survival is reliant on this.

Now I'm not insinuating here that God is a virus and that being a Christian is like been ill. But let's just imagine for a second here that we replace the imagined virus and replaced it with God's love and the good news of Jesus and we take each of my above points again. When we first hear the message of God's good news, it is all consuming and whether we like it or not, it has a reaction on us, whether this be an acceptance of Jesus as saviour, a longing to know more, or even outright protest, it evokes a response, kind of like an immune response.
Secondly this response leads to a change in behaviour. Maybe in voluntarily we'll be thinking about it, maybe we're wanting to know more, or potentially trying to evaluate its validity. Maybe we're disputing it, rubbishing it in our heads, however this is still a response and these first two points are representative of an individual response.

Now onto my third point, arguably the main one. Gods good news isn't going to spread without a vector. To those who aren't 'infected', this can't happen without a vector, demonstrating that people aren't going to turn to God without hearing about his good news, if no one shares it with them. Therefore it brings to me the image of us acting as 'vectors' to enable Gods love to reach more people, and begin to have a major societal impact.

Just a few thoughts to ponder on. Trust it to be on something that I'd understand so vividly!!

XOX